A Dream about my Lost Brother

The title of this post may have grabbed your attention.

To clear things up, I want to tell you that the boy I will talk about was never certainly going to be my brother.

I will give more details later, but although he was never officially my big brother, he will always be in my heart.

 

That being said, here is the post I had planned to write:

Last night I had a vivid dream.

Before I tell it, I want to give you a pit of background.

After my parent were married, they hosted a sweet, young boy from Belarus in the summer.

His name was Stas.

He began coming home to spend summer with my family, before I was born, when he was 8 years old.

In fact, Stas was here in the US with my parents when I was at the time of my birth. 
It was a work of God for us through him that I was born at home instead of in VA.
My parent were going to Virginia to see family for July 4th, but Stas suddenly got a high fever and my parents decided to wait. 
And then I was born unexpectantly the next day 6 weeks prematurely on July 3d.
God worked for me and my parents through this sweet little boy, and I will always have him to thank for that, among other thing. 



Stas came every year for 10 wonderful summers.

My parents and I (though my parents remember it better) had the privilege of seeing Stas grow up from a sweet little 8 year old, to an even-sweeter-still 18 year old.

One year my little 6 year-old heart was broken when my big brother, Stas, never showed up.

I have missed him every year since.

 

Stas was wonderful.

My parents could speak more to this, I have absolutely ZERO memories of Stas misbehaving or giving us a hard time.

What I remember is my "big brother" playing baby dolls with Brandon and me,

swimming in the pool with him, his sincere smile,
 and - maybe my favorite - Stas reading Brandon and me a story book in Belarusian and not being fazed when we laughed our heads off because of how funny the language sounded to us.


 

And then he would leave.

I don't remember many of the early years,

but I do remember one year when I woke up early (after he had left) and I went upstairs to his room.
All his things were gone.
Every toy was put away.
Every trace of him vanished.
I looked for a picture of him, and couldn't find even that.
That may have been the last year he ever came.
Somehow my 6 year-old heart knew that I'd never see him again on earth.



Stas had a special possession.
It was a stuffed animal Pooh Bear, who he would never take back to Belarus with him for fear of it getting stolen.

 He loved it, and I, as young as I was, could see that.
Years after he left the last time, I gathered Brandon and David in my room and showed them the Pooh Bear. 
I told them how Stas had cherished it.
Then I told them that I had promised to myself that I would keep it for him every year until he returned.  I would not let it get thrown or given away.
I was Stas's, and Stas's it would remain.

*sigh*

But, in my dream,

I was standing in our playroom (of our new house, which Stas has never seen) with my parents.
Kaden and Bethany were there playing as well.
I turned around, and there was Stas, about 16 years old, not saying a word, only standing there with a huge smile on his face and joy in his eyes.
My mouth dropped open and I just stood there, speechless.
Words escaped me and I didn't know what to do.
Not like the awkward silence that occurs when someone forgets their line in a play or anything.
No, it was nothing like that. 
It was a total, joyous overpowering that rendered me speechless.
Suddenly, I ran from the room to get something.
I came back with the Pooh Bear, and placed it in his hands.
And then my dream ended.

In my dream, Stas looked exactly like this

I don't know what exactly it means.
Maybe I will see Stas again on earth.
Maybe God's trying to tell me that I'm released from my promise, as simple as it may be.
Maybe Stas has found a family wherever he is.
Perhaps I can stop remembering him with the twinge of sadness over my loss.
Whatever it may be, I know that God has it under control, and I can simply trust him.
I love you, Stas!




Our Baby Shower

It is a matter of days until my dad will meet my little sister and brother for the first time.

 

It is only a matter of weeks until they are home forever.

Sometimes seems like a dream to me.  I have thought about the day when they would come home for so long, it doesn't seem real that they'll be coming home so soon. 

 I used to have dreams about having a little sister.  Then I would wake up and remember it was only a dream, but now it is not.  It is a reality.

 

One of my family's very good friends had a sort of baby shower for us a few days ago.  People came and brought baby formula for us to take to the orphanage, and we brought pictures for them to see of our little kids.
Before we left everyone gathered around us and prayed over our family, and for all the changes that will be happening.  That time was amazing.  The power of God was felt.  It was so real, and touching. 
 

Philippians 4:6-7 do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.

Thanks so much to those who came, and to those who made it happen!

 

Foregoing It!

So a few posts ago i mentioned the Forgo project.  Basically what is is, is you would take something like an appetizer at a restaurant and instead of ordering it, you would use the money that you would have paid for it and give it to the Forgo Project who gives it to a selected orphanage.  What is really cool is that the orphanage the money is going to this month, is the one where our kids are at.  So what we are doing, is each day for our main meal we are eating rice and beans (probably what our kids are having) and giving the money that we would have spent on a more luxurious meal to the Forgo Project.  You can forgo too, it is really easy to give, and it is for a really great cause.  Just go here and download it to your smartphone.  Then, Forgo!  fundraising

No Words

There are no words to describe this video.  People in America take for granted soooooo many things.  But some children want just one thing:  someone to love them.  Someone to tell them that matter.  Someone to care about them.

And is our God is for us, then who could ever stop us?

One of my favorite worship songs is Our God, by Chris Tomlin.  My favorite verses are,

And if our God is for us, then who could ever stop us?  And if our God is with us, than what could stand against?  

W.O.W.  It reminds me so much that anything God wants us to do will get done.  If God want us to bring Chance and Benjamin home quicker than we ever could have hoped for, He will do it.

God gave us a love (for the orphans), before we even asked
He gave us a country, one other than what we had originally thought
He gave us an agency, better than what we could have hoped
He gave us faces, before we expected 
He gave us Himself, more than what we deserve 

A life changer video, and a day in our lives

I found this video on All God's Children's website.  I was very touched by it.  I hope you are too.  Please pray for all the orphans who are/will be adopted, but even more, pray for those who wont.

Also...

• On Sunday my cousins brought their kids over to play with us.  Their kids names are Rylan and Allie, and they will be staying with us for a few days while their parents go to Colorado for a wedding.  They were a lot of fun, and they are really sweet kids.  

• A cutie pie named Liam came over to play. (be babysat)  He is such a sweetheart!  He wakes up laughing and is a really easy baby.  What is really neat is that he is the same age as our Benjamin.  Wouldn't that be cool if they became friends!?  

Blessed.

We are so blessed to be living in America.  I was always told by my parents and other adults that we were blessed, but i guess i never really got the picture.  I see it now. I started to get it, for the first time, last year when I went on a missions trip to the Dominican Republic with our church youth group.  I saw just enough to get a picture of poverty. But recently I have been researching the Democratic Republic of Congo, (where we are adopting from) and what i read just broke my heart. People die all the time.  There is so much civil unrest and not enough food, malaria, sickness, so many things i cannot describe, and so many people.  So many orphans.  From a survey taken, over 45,000 people died or were killed.  Half of those were/are children under five years old.  Here is some of the article:

Lynsey Addario for The New York Times

 The survey, released Tuesday, estimated that 45,000 people continue to die every month, about the same pace as in 2004, when the international push to rebuild the country had scarcely begun. Almost all the deaths come from hunger and disease, signs that the country is still grappling with the aftermath of a war that gutted its infrastructure, forced millions to flee and flattened its economy. In all, more than 5.4 million people have died in Congo since the war began in 1998, according to the most recent survey’s estimate, the latest in a series completed by the International Rescue Committee, an American aid organization. Nearly half of the dead were children younger than 5 years old.

Source:http://topics.nytimes.com/top/news/international/countriesandterritories/congothedemocraticrepublicof/index.html