Gunsi Update

Eight months after hugging little Gunsi goodbye for the last time, 

I still have the incredible privilege of watching her and sweet little Metalepule grow up.

Every few weeks I'll text Ms. Dorah to see how things are with the creshe and beg for a few photos of Gunsi.  On top of that, Not Forgotten is really good about keeping

 their Facebook page updated, and though it sometimes requires some searching,  I can almost always spot my baby somewhere in the photos.  

Technology has its ups and downs, but getting to watch Gunsi 

and Metalepule grow and thrive is a major perk.  

Leaving South Africa meant leaving a huge piece of my heart with the children I loved and friendships I cherished.  For months and months I begged God to let me go back to where my heart was.  Some days my heart leaped as I thought the answer was yes.  Other days I wanted to cry as I watched the door seem to close.  Right now, it looks as though SA will not be a huge part of my immediate future, though I look forward to a possibly visiting within the next two years, and then doing part of my college missions training there within the next three years.  

Sometimes the answer is no, as I feared.  But other times the answer is wait, and God has given me the grace to be ok with that as other doors are opening.  

Anyway, back to the girls!

Gunsi is now about 18 months and thriving!  The little miracle is catching up quickly after her rough start and is doing wonderfully.

I was able to watch her sit up on her own, scoot, crawl and now even WALK through pictures and videos.  I was even able to see her "in person" take some of her first step through FaceTime and cheer her on from across the ocean.  My baby is doing so very well.  

Gunsi in the picture above was beginning to get better, but still had a long road ahead of her.  I was preparing to leave within the next couple days, and my heart was heavy not knowing what was going to happen to her.  I remember thinking that it was nice seeing her doing well that day, because I secretly feared she wouldn't make it in the months

ahead. I should have just trusted my God!  He has her in the palm of His hands and she is doing so well, as shown in the picture to the right.  

 !  

Gunsi is walking!

So proud of her.  

It made my heart happy

 seeing how much she adored

 Ms. Kedi and how much 

Ms. Kedi loved her. 

Little Metalepule has completely transformed!  From a lethargic and struggling child who would rarely make eye contact with me, she has grown into a THRIVING, healthy, and joyful little girl.  It made my heart so happy to speak to her through FaceTime and see her smile shyly and speak into the camera.  Honestly, the change is so dramatic that I wouldn't have even recognized her if I Mrs. Mimi hadn't told me it was Metalepule.  We are praising God the miracle of these girls lives! 

Metalupule in July (left) and Metalepule in January (right)

 So blessed by these girls and the miraculous work God has done in their lives!  

http://notforgottensa.com/ 

Light in the Darkness

It was such a sweet Father's Day Sunday to be reminded of the father heart of my God...

I found myself feeling quite down with the weight of my helplessness in Huncie's life.  

Thinking much about her as well as discussing her situation with the teachers and others who may have advice only confirmed the utter silence of our voices against the empty ears of the government.  

And this morning left me wondering just what must I do?

And then we took off for church and the Lord encouraged me so greatly through the message.  Based out of Luke 15, the pastor talked through the stories of the lost sheep, lost coin, and the prodigal son.  In each case I saw Huncie's mother being sought after in love by the Lord as he waits for her to respond.  I listened to the parable as the Father saw His son so far off in the distance and ran to meet her with arms wide open.  As soon as Huncie's mother turns and looks toward her Father, I know he will, as He promises, run to meet her right where she is and take her home.
So very thankful for this sweet morning when my Father picked me up and reminded of His love.  He is in control, He truly, truly is.

South Africa - 11 days

The countdown became serious as soon as 50 days until South Africa hit.

Now we are at 11.

Oh my goodness... 

I remember coping the days into my planner, beginning at about 90.  Counting down from 60, to 45, to 30, to 20 and so on.  It was a breeze at first - quick and easy. 

Then I hit 19, 18, 17, 16, 15, 14, it became tedious, and dragged on and on.  In the back on my mind I was thinking, "I'll never make it.  There so much time."  

Time passed, and week four hit, then three, then two.

But there was still so much to do.  

Final exams, Jr/Sr, tests, soccer tournament, honors society zoo trip, etc., etc., etc.

But now, at 11 days left, most of that is over.  Exams have been exempted, tests have been taken, the soccer tournament is a thing of the past, the zoo trip is now memories and pictures... and now 12 days are left and reality has stuck.

South Africa 2k16, is almost here.  Really and truly, it is almost here.  

Wow, you guys, lets do this.
Departure in 11 days.

It's Going to be Ok

It will, it really will. 

I still don't understand.  I still ache to hold the sweet Ugandan babies at Amani.  

I still don't get it, but it's ok somehow...

I kept thinking of the quote that says,

"When God gives you a 'no', give Him and 'thank you'.  He was

 protecting you from less than His best." 

Thinking about that yesterday made me want to scream.  It was the absolute last thing I wanted to hear.  Reading Bible verse I usually love, hurt.  To read how God has picked us to be His people, called by His name to proclaim the gospel, only made me think of how I had claimed those promises for the Uganda trip - and all that was left of that was my broken heart.  

That was yesterday.

Today I'm ready to look up again, to decide that this isn't going to break me.

The old cliche about life being 10% what happens to you and 90% how you respond to it?  I'm beginning to realize there's some truth in that.

I want God to use this - I don't want me to hinder the Lord working this out for His glory.  

What my mom told my sobbing self yesterday, 

just has to be true.

"God must be doing something really big here.  If He wasn't, it wouldn't be hurting this badly."

Please, Lord, do something big...turn this hurt into something that can be used for you...

I don't understand...but thank you that you do.  

When I Don't Understand

Today brought some hard, hard news for me.

It's honestly hard to believe that so much could happen in a day.

I thought everything was settled... I thought I'd be boarding a plane to Uganda in 120 days... I thought that was God's will... I thought I was sure.

I just don't understand.  

Have I accepted it?  Not really.  Even now I'm trying to work something out for Uganda, refusing to let go of this dream...

Learning that I wouldn't be going to Uganda this summer felt like part of me was dying.  

Just like a death in a family, everything reminded me of my loss.

Christmas songs playing on the radio?

They remind me of baby Emmanuel I won't be meeting anytime soon.

Baby blankets in the little's closet?  

They remind me of the suitcases full of supplies that I won't be taking to Uganda.

The picture of two sweet Ugandan babies I posted on Instagram not 24 hours ago?

It reminds me of the reality that was alive then and is postponed now.  

Walking down the craft isle in Walmart?

It reminded me that I won't be needing to make a countdown to Uganda after all.  

Reading through my Bible?

Reminds me that even though I don't understand, God is in control.

Is it ok?

No, it hurts.

Is it God's will?

If it is, He'll give me the grace to accept it.

But right now, I'm so thankful for those who know me best reminding me of God's truth...

This comment from Gandy gives me so much grace to believe... Believe that God has a plan in this.

She wrote,

..."I know that God has a plan for you and only time will tell what His plan for you is... Right now you must trust His timing and accept that you must get on with your life as you grow into the woman He has in mind....His plans will become clearer as you grow and learn..."  

 Thank God for Gandy... and for Mom who knows that it's like to have formally open doors closed to you.  She told me, "Brittany, you know that when it hurts this badly, God is doing something really big behind the scenes..."

 I don't get it.  This hurts.  And all the same, I know deep down in my heart that God does have something big... right now trusting is incredibly hard, but I know that my Father loves me... and right now that's enough.   

A Taste of Africa

These precious girls and the rest of the African Children's Choir were incredible!  

It was such a blessing to have them come to Reimage Church to sing and give us a taste of the beauty Uganda. 

My heart is in Africa these days.

Plans are in the works, dreams are becoming realities, and best of all, God is working.

And the joy of hosting these sweet girls and "Auntie Dorthy" was icing on the cake.

I thank God for their resiliency and grace after a crazy morning like the one we had...

But just like my new friend, Ms. Tina, said, "No matter what happens, these kids will bounce back."

So true.  I witnessed it.

Their joy was contagious, their smiles were countless, and their heart for the Lord is to be envied.

At 7-9 years old, they have a boldness for and trust in God that far exceeds that of many adults. 

These girls are a joy, and they are changing the world... one song at a time. 

"When I was in my mother's womb, you knew me.  Before I was born, you set me apart." 

- Jeremiah 1:5